You may have seen it advertised on the Tennis, but now you get to see what it really looks like. It's the new Kia Cerato, and despite the fact that only cheapos will buy them, I thought I'd let you know what it's all about. Kia will tell you about how cutting edge their new car is, but it's only really a Hyundai Elantra - which arrived here for sale a whole two years ago. Nevertheless, it is here to persuade you that Kia definitely mean business. I'm not too sure it works, but on the other hand, I am sure that someone out there will really like this new Cerato.

The styling is somewhat of a departure from the looks of current Kias, and debuts what will become the new corporate face of Kia. The reason for the new design is that Kia have a new head designer, Peter Schreyer, who came to Kia from Volkswagen. The Cerato is an example of the apparently distinctive new "Schreyer Line" grille - which is as unremarkable as any other grille, just that it has two extra slithers of chrome near the Kia badge.

So anyway, the way it looks. The main influence here is clearly Honda, from the shape of headlights (which look interchangeable with the new Accord Euro) to the V-shaped face design, to the shape of the rear lights and boot (which screams "Civic" to me). But I still can't shake a little sense of Ford BF Falcon in the bonnet and the side profile, even though I very well know that Kia wouldn't be influenced by a large Australian sedan that is not sold anywhere else in the world.

So yes, I do believe it is be very derivative, but rather boring and safe nonetheless. Although having said that, the new Cerato is infinitely classier than the Elantra it is based upon, and although that doesn't say much, surely this can only help Kia in their quest to be perceived as a high quality car maker.

Less helpful is the design of the interior, which here is pictured in top spec SLi form (note the little bits of piano black finish, which is becoming more and more popular everywhere, it seems). While the centre console is rather nice, the overall impression of the interior is that it is very cheap. The fake metal finish just looks like silver plastic, and while the dark overall colour of the interior is meant to give the Cerato a European ambience, the overwhelming use of what I like to call "orange peel" plastics (you know, that rough dimply stuff that tells you it's a cheap car) spoils it. It also has probably the ugliest steering wheel design I've seen for quite a while.

But the Cerato will stay cheap, with a starting price of $18,990 - which becomes even more attractive with an optional $1,000 package that includes Stability Control, Traction Control, Cruise Control, and Audio Controls on the steering wheel. I call it... the control pack. Equally impressive is the new engine, still a 2.0 Litre, but with 115kW (making it the most powerful naturally aspirated 2.0 Litre in its class), and a tidy economy figure of 7.9L/100km. And with all six airbags as standard issue, the new Cerato suddenly sounds quite attractive.

In fact, Kia reckons that only prejudice will stop them selling a heap of Ceratos this year. They've set the target of 3,000 - but regardless, I'm starting to thing it might be worth a look for people who want conservative looks and a high level of features, without having to pay a high price.

NEWS: 2009 Kia Cerato is an Interesting Mish-Mash...

I can't believe how sick of the Holden Epica diesel I am. I never seen them on the road, but I see them everywhere - in ads! Holden desperately want the Epica to sell, but the car was flawed from the start. Let me fill you in.

Holden used to source its small car range from GM Europe - basically Opel. We had the Barina (Corsa in Europe), which was quite good, even if it did age dramatically after competitors like the Mazda2 and Honda Jazz enter the market; there was the Vectra, which was pretty mediocre; and there was the Astra, which was a sales tour-de-force, because it was really good, and suited Australian buyers.

The last Vectra flopped around the world, and Barina sales slowed. So Holden put their heads together, and came to the conclusion that these cars must be selling slowly because they were too expensive - which wasn't the case at all. The Barina was just simply getting old, and the Vectra was just crap.

So Holden sourced a new line of vehicles from GM Korea (formerly Daewoo, but now a GM product supplier) - because Korean cars are much cheaper. However, they forgot to mention that Korean cars are much worse than their European counterparts (well, generally). So we now have a Daewoo Kalos for a Barina - a shocking car in every respect (with a 2-star ANCAP safety rating...!). Surprise surprise, it isn't selling well. They introduced the Captiva as a rival to the Ford Territory, but the Territory is obviously better, so no one is buying Captivas either. We also have the irrelevant Viva, which is another case of "why would you bother"? It's no wonder Toyota is now outstripping Holden sales by about 2:1 - once upon a time (not too long ago) Holden used to dominate the Australian sales charts.

But now there is the Epica - not an "epic car" by any stretch of the imagination, and a totally uninspiring piece of kit that makes Holden look about six or seven years behind the times. The otherwise quite bland Subaru Liberty looks cool by comparison, and the new Accord Euro and Mazda6 (especially) are light years ahead.

Which brings me back to the ads. Apart from that stodgy slogan - "Go Better" - Holden has a problem on their hands, in that they have a decidedly boring product to advertise. It will never beat its Japanese rivals (listed above) on excitement, so they've decided to compare the Epica to something equally unexciting. The Toyota Camry. You can tell a car maker is getting desperate when they take a stab at other car makers.

The Epica diesel is 20% more economical than a Toyota Camry, apparently - a petrol Camry, so you'd bloody well hope it is. Because of how much more expensive diesel is than petrol, the Epica ends up only about 8% cheaper to run. Woohoo. The real difference is when the Holden breaks down five times a month because it's made by slave labourers in Korea, whereas the indestructible Camry keeps on keeping on. Don't get me wrong, I hate Camrys too, but the point is that Holden had to pick on something as boring as the Toyota Camry to try and make the Epica look good ("try" being the operative word).

And yet, Holden are merely showing their contempt of the intelligence of Australian car buyers by attempting to pass the Epica off as a world-class car. Show Holden that you aren't that stupid, and buy something else. Show Holden that Australians believe in quality, not just a price tag.

RANT: Those pesky Holden Epica ads!